I was chatting with a friend the other week, and (as usual) discussing some aspects of his dating life.

(It’s tough for people to avoid this topic when they’re around me)

Anyway, he was sharing a couple of concerns… mostly about losing leads, overgaming, etc. when something stood out to me.

Something that I’ve seen with many other guys in the past as well.

And something that, while perhaps not told to my friend by a woman, I’ve heard told to other guys before for the same reason… (and if I recall correctly, even yours truly)

“Sorry, could you say that again?”

Now, you might be asking me why I think this phrase is so bad.

And maybe I’m exaggerating when I say the WORST.

(You could make an argument, I suppose, that “you’re an ugly boring loser, don’t talk to me” is worse)

But it’s pretty bad.

Because it shows that women find you difficult to understand.

Which generally means you don’t have presence.

Now, much of this problem could be situational or tactical.

For instance, in a loud bar, it could have nothing to do with you if she can’t understand you.

Though this means you should be talking less, and being physical more, since you talking and her not hearing it makes her feel the same way about you, reasons aside.

More commonly, however, the problem is tactical.

You’re either talking too fast, mumbling, or talking too quietly.

Maybe these problems come from deeper strategic reasons, such as low self-confidence.

But this is one of those things where the door really swings both ways.

If you talk slower, more clearly, more loudly — people will receive you better.

You’ll appear more confident, more masculine, more relevant.

And you’ll start to feel it too.

So if you find it’s a pattern of people not understanding you.

Work on that, friend.

And if you want some honest feedback?

I can help you with that too.

While friends might make comments that imply certain things… they tend to dance around the real things you need to improve, because these can offend.

The luxury of working with a coach such as yours truly is that I’ll tell you the things you NEED to know.

Lovingly, of course.

But directly.

So you stop making mistakes, however slight, and can start stepping into the romantic life you’ve always wanted.

Apply here: www.patstedman.com/application

– Pat