A bit ago I got a question from a reader on a topic I don’t know too much about, at least from personal experience.

But it’s a good one since it’s one of those questions everybody just parrots the usual answers about, like a bunch of dummies.

I am talking about whether or not you should date a single mother.

Now, I don’t talk about this demographic very often.

Mostly because I’m a relatively young guy, and when I was single, I didn’t really date any.

(Ok, I went on one date with one, but it was a random “swipe” from the app version of OKCupid — think a beta-version of Tinder. The date was very impulsive, and though I had full power to do things with her… there was a lot of sexual talk, and she wanted to go to my place right then and there… she had a lot of baggage, wasn’t even fully single, and though I considered it… my head prevailed)

But I can give you a TL;DR answer:

If you’re not a single father, no.

If you are a single father, yes.

In fact — I think they’re preferable for many of these men (unless you are wealthy) because you guys will be able to relate to past experiences, understanding of each others’ limited schedules, boundaries, and priorities.

People without kids just don’t understand what it’s like to have them.

And having worked with some men who HAVE dated single mothers, without having any kids themselves… the dynamic can become very tricky.

Should you meet the kids, how much time you can spend together, rapid cancellations due to emergencies, problems with the ex… they tend to crowd the passion of the dynamic.

And in many ways, they should.

A single parent’s first priorities should ALWAYS be their children.

(If not, be careful… you’re dealing with a messed up person… and that crazy WILL rebound on you at some point.)

So, that’s the deal.

That said, I think it’s great that some guys DO make the plunge and take the role of a father-figure for some children. Some people call it being “cucked” when guys do this… that is a fucking adolescent, gross generalization.

Taking on someone’s kids as your own to be a “nice guy” and get the girl, to be manipulated into doing all the providing… this is being cucked, or just being a shitty step-dad, but I’m not even sure it’s the norm.

The guys spouting off this shit as generalities are bitter male-versions of cat ladies. If you’re a guy who willingly takes on the burden of those kids, and tries to do right by them — I don’t get what kind of level of fucked up you have to be on to make fun of these guys.

This role isn’t easy — even though you can do a lot of good, But it’s why I don’t recommend it.

If you want to hook up, however?

Well… if you saw my last email you might know where I’m going with this.

But absolutely.

Single mothers are often so focused on their kids and job that they don’t have time or inclination to even pursue a relationship.

Often all they want is sex.

So, if you’re a guy whose into that sort of casual, repeat, hook up buddy / harem (aka tier 3, maybe tier 2 dating) they are great options.

They generally won’t cause you a lot of trouble.

But it still begs the question:

How do you attract them?

Well, you gotta frequent different locations, most likely, but the psychology is the same. They are still women… just women with less time on their hands for games.

So you’ve got to present your value quickly and directly.

Something I can show you quite nicely how to do.

Work with me if you’re game to find out: www.patstedman.com/application

It took me 10 years to understand the female mind like I do now. But if you work with me, it could take you as little as 3 months to acquire it yourself…

– Pat