Everyone who’s at least somewhat awake to gender dynamics understands, when it comes to preselection, women desire men who are high status and good-looking.
(though note: status is relative to the environment, so don’t think you need to be an international celebrity to have high status!)
But is there a way to determine whether a give woman prefers one trait or the other?
No way to do it definitively, but there are clues.
Specifically, based on a woman’s own level.
First, let’s not disregard that in general, people date their own level of status and attractiveness (with men usually having a slight edge).
But the higher up a woman is in one of the two categories, the more she tends to prefer guys in the other.
a) Lack of options comparable to her
b) Desire to emphasize her own gifts
A woman who is successful will generally want a guy as or more successful than her. These are the rules of hypergamy; they don’t change.
But high status, successful women often struggle to find (and keep) such guys, especially if said women’s looks are only average / above-average aesthetically.
So what do the women do instead?
Find guys who aren’t as successful as them, but more attractive.
Hence the rise of the cougar in modern society.
Note for most women this isn’t an ideal pairing. Women usually want a guy who dominates them in their own hierarchy.
But aesthetic is a form of status in-of-itself, and meh looking successful women will often take this path instead — find a up-and-coming pretty boy (or guy simply younger than them).
Less attractive successful guys often do the same, but inverted.
Rather than choose a woman of similar status, they’ll take a young, beautiful, but relatively unknown one.
Not the most stable approach, but it happens.
Now, one last thing before we wrap up.
It’s a common trope around here that men do well dating younger women; that these relationships are the ideal. This is true but subject to the degree of range.
15+ year age differences are generally quite unstable due to various differences in health / attitude / experience. To say otherwise is to fantasize. Even 10 year age gaps require heavy screening.
The issue is also that when man and women are competing in the same hierarchy the power structure is clear-cut.
If a man and women are both successful but the man is more successful, and him and wife have the same status / class, then the dynamic has predictability. This goes with comparable looks as well; one is not attracting more undue attention than the other.
If a high status, successful guy is dating a model however the power dynamics are muddled. He is more powerful than her in one sense but not in another. It is both a feature and a bug.
You can see why more people thus sort with members of the opposite sex who are at similar levels as them in looks and status. The only ones who tend to gamble are those who are extreme in one category or the other.
Quite interesting, no?
Anyway, if you want to ponder more on this… I highly recommend you check out my masterclass.
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