I’ve been trying to cut back on my social media usage.

I find my mood *and* concentration are better when I lay off, even if I’m only looking when I’m not working.

Which has led to the phone being removed from many places, such as the bathroom.

At my house, I basically sit in silence. Ruminate with my thoughts; watching them come and go.

(a good meditative practice)

At my parent’s house though, I can’t help but peruse their stack of magazines to “pass the time.”And a recent article I read was about a pig.

Basically, this guy in Canada was randomly offered a miniature pig online by an acquaintance.

Surprisingly, this did not weird out the Canadian guy, who decided enthusiastically to accept the pig. (I need to talk to that acquaintance about lead-generation)

Anyway, the tiny little pig arrived at his doorstep.

Cute, no?

I could almost see why he accepted.

Except turns out, he didn’t actually get a miniature pig.

He got a commercial one.

And as the weeks went by, the pig grew.

From 15 pounds to 30.

To 60.

To 80.




Ultimately, capping out at a whopping 650 pounds.

A bit of a problem for a house pet.

Anyhoo, the whole scenario got me thinking about women.

Specifically, relationships.

Like how when you let a woman into your life, at first the impact is relatively small.

“15 pounds” of pressure on your lifestyle, if you will.

But as she spends more time around you, that pressure grows.

To the point where even if you only expected it to get as bad as “80 pounds” or so, you’ll eventually be dealing with efforts to change you that are as large as, say, a fully grown commercial pig in a small apartment.

Point being?

Be careful what you bring into your life.

It’s a *fact* that women will try to change you if they can.

This is not to judge, but simply be aware.

To a woman you are a project.

And if you let her, she will mold you exactly how she likes… or rather, how she *thinks* she likes.

Because the crazy thing about female psychology is that the more you conform to her requirements, the less she will like what she has. The more “complete” the project, the less interested she becomes.

A paradox, but that’s the way it is.

The lesson here is simple.

Should you choose to shack up with a woman (a valid decision with many benefits as well as risks), one, know what you’re getting into.

There ARE going to be tests and challenges to your modus operandi.

Accept this going in, and don’t throw a hissy fit when they happen.

But two, resist her attempts at transforming you.

This isn’t to say be an asshole. Or to not grow in your role in the relationship.

But understand that what a woman loves isn’t what she says she loves. What women love is simple.

A man who lives life on his own terms.

Whose orientation is fundamentally himself.

People will say I’m wrong because they don’t like it (that’s selfish! do the right thing aka what I say, be a man!), and its contrary to pretty much every piece of conventional wisdom.

But it’s the truth.

You can either learn it now.

Or, buy that “miniature” pig online and see for yourself.


– Pat

PS Female psychology is important to understand in all of dating. But nowhere does it matter more than in texting. For $4.99 you can get this area handed for good. Don’t delay, buy my book Tackling Texting now: https://www.amazon.com/Tackling-Texting-Women-Natural-Dating-ebook/dp/B06XRC4C5K/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1490559745&sr=8-1&keywords=tackling+texting

PPS I only publish old emails like this on the website. To join the list and get the new, daily ones, go here: www.patstedman.com/optin