Let me tell you a tale of two men.
The first man wants to meet women, so he learns pickup. Invests time and money into becoming more attractive, better at speaking with women, and leading an interesting life.
By all accounts, he accomplishes his goal and gets really good at meeting and attracting women.
2 years later, his friends are commenting on how good he is with girls.
5 years later, he’s in the top 1% of charm and charisma and attracts women wherever he goes.
He’s constantly dating new women. Very good at daygame. Even considers starting a Youtube channel to leverage his skills and start a coaching business one day. That’s how good he is.
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The other man wants to find the right woman for him, and knows he needs to get good with women to do this.
He does many of the same things. Gets in shape, learns game, expands his social circle.
It works and he becomes more charismatic and attractive.
He dates quite a bit and starts to develop a sense of who is a good fit for him.
A year later, meets a girl who checks all the boxes. They’re into each other, share values, and have a healthy relationship. It’s a great match.
So he retires from “the game” and decides to go deeper with her. Soon they’re engaged, then married, then having kids.
He accomplished his goal, but had a VERY different goal from the first guy.
The first guy wanted to get good with women. That was his final destination. The means was the end.
The second guy, on the other hand, wanted to get good with women so he could find the right women. It was a means to an end.
These are very different approaches, but it’s important to bring it up because it’s what makes working with me different.
Not every guy I work with wants to get married – although a large percentage do – but they all have a specific type of relationship they want with women. It’s not about POWER over women, it’s about power over their own fate.
I often use taglines like “get the dating life you desire.” It’s actually a huge hindrance to my business growth because I don’t get to say a particular outcome like “get married” or “go on dates with hot girls every week.”
Instead, I’m letting you choose the outcome and then helping you get there. So long as it’s ethical, I’ll help you achieve it.
But it’s worth noting that guys don’t always come to me with exact clarity about what they want.
Most of the guys who come to me looking to just get better with women, really DO want a serious relationship deep down. They just may not be ready for it yet. Which is perfectly OK. I don’t tell them they need to go for it now, but just to keep an open mind about it for the future.
And sometimes it even goes the opposite direction. I might have a guy who because of his stated values is looking for a serious relationship — but you can tell, really is not all that interested in it in practice. He wants to date around. He doesn’t want to be tied down. So I encourage him to drop his “musts” or “shoulds” and explore what his nature is telling him to do.
I might be impartial to monogamy, but I’ve learned after doing this for a decade that you can’t force people to choose the path you took — certainly not on your timeline. Sometimes the best thing you can do for a client is tell him “look, this is really what you want, and it’s OK – try it out.” They’ve already made their decision in their heart anyway; what they need help with is seeing this and accepting it.
Which is why I’m not just in the business of teaching “love skills.”
My job is to clarify your vision of your love life and help you to get there.
It might be what you think, it might not.
But the good news is, whichever goal you want with women in the near-future, I can help you get there.
