It seems these things go through cycles.
15-20 years ago, game was *the* way to meet women. Didn’t matter how hot or in what scene a girl was — you could get her if you understood attraction. Guys who mastered cold approach were the elite with women.
Then it shifted to looks. Girls really didn’t care about your game — they cared about how jacked you were. Women sleep with hot guys… just don’t be “weird” and sex will happen naturally.
And finally, as expected, it’s turned more recently towards money and status. Do powerful men know you? Do you drive a Lambo? The most attractive women only end up with these men — everything else is irrelevant.
The promotion of one of these categories over another is no different than the bullshit you see in the fitness community, with people arguing over vegan, carnivore, whether or not fruit is bad, etc etc etc
The answer is always the same: NUANCE. Just like vegetables provide certain benefits and some people may need to eat more of them, meat provides benefits and others may need to more of them. Most people will end up as omnivores, with some choosing to specialize heavily with a certain category of food.
Which is essentially what I explained with my concept of the Three Pillars of Attraction. All three of these categories matter with women; they all simply trigger different things in the attraction process.
But what probably gets the most crap and controversy of all of these categories is the role of money.
Some guys INSIST women only care about cash. Others of course scoff at this; broke guys sleep with attractive girls all the time.
But this confusion among guys is simple. Because there is money, and then there is MONEY.
As I explained in detail on my post about rich guys and women, the primary role of money in attraction is as an AMPLIFIER. It doesn’t turn on girls per se, but it makes what is desirable about a guy otherwise more desirable. This is similar to the role comfort plays in attraction, which places money in the comfort element of preselection (vs looks and status, which cause desire).
However, the reason we usually talk about money and status together is because if you have money, you almost ALWAYS have some degree of status. Because money offers access which offers power.
Which is why when we talk about money we have to really distinguish it. There is “basic” money which is really simply not having financial stress. This is all most women require when it comes to settling down. You need to be able to take care of yourself AND a woman and children comfortably. This expectation scales with age, which is why younger guys are not really judged on their financial status (but they are more judged based on their looks).
So if you are playing this game that most people play, money doesn’t really matter much for attraction. Whether you make 50k or 150k is almost entirely a comfort issue, it doesn’t do much for desire. And the reason is that a guy making 150k doesn’t really have a huge jump in status at the end of the day — his money is still just really improving quality of life, rather than access.
This doesn’t really start to shift decisively until you hit (realistically) 10 million net worth.
Once you get to this level, you not only have the ability to go to places and have experiences that would captivate your average girl… but far more importantly you get ACCESS to attractive women themselves. Because the most attractive women tend to be at places only the most wealthy guys hang out.
So understand the big distinction here. Money for the most part is comfort, and an amplifier of attraction. It doesn’t get you girls. But at the very high levels it becomes a ticket to “play the game” with 9s and 10s. Because these women go where power and status are, and when you get to that level of wealth your opinion in the world starts to matter.
Of course, this doesn’t mean you can’t meet these elite girls elsewhere. And it doesn’t mean that you need money to attract them.
But you are facing way more difficult logistics trying to cold approach a model on the street when she’s shopping vs grabbing champagne next to her at a 10k+ per ticket gala. These are the kind of places that you find these women (along with TONS of 7s and 8s); otherwise you’re seeking a needle in a haystack.
Which is the final thing I’ll add before we wrap this up.
Hot girls aren’t ANY different than regular girls. They bleed the same, cry the same, love the same.
But when we aren’t around hot girls regularly, we tend to put them on a pedestal.
The benefit of money is that when you are surrounded by attractive girls, and THEY are the ones expressing interest to you… it becomes MUCH harder to have a scarcity mindset.
So yes… it IS a big hack with women being rich. Let’s not downplay it.
But does money automatically mean these guys get girls?
Unless you’re talking about escorts, NO.
Access doesn’t equal success.
Which is why if you are a wealthy guy and struggling with women, you are INSANE if you do not get a coach to show you what you are doing wrong.
I honestly get it for a lot of middle class guys. I’m not cheap. And most do not yet have an abundance attitude in life, and value their bank account more than their love life — nor grasp how the breakthroughs I make with them with women will ultimately help them earn more in life.
(30-40% of my clients end up leaving their jobs or getting big promotions during our time together, and end up making far more money)
But rich guys?
You should know that money is merely a TOOL for access.
If you can afford to access a man who would change your life…
Why wouldn’t you?
www.patstedman.com/application
– Pat
