A funny tweet from “mentally ill women twitter” was brought to my attention this morning:
I was asked, “Hey Pat, would love to hear your take on this question and why women overwhelmingly respond “no” to this”
Well, to answer the first part — yes, women *absolutely* stress about the “one who got away.” There are whole stores full of romance novels dedicated to getting such guys back. And if you have any experience attracting women, you know first hand these women go to sometimes extreme lengths to stop you from exiting their lives.
None of this should be surprising. It’s common for both *men* and women to fantasize about the person they lost (or foolishly left) if they were “out of their league”… and to blame themselves for it.
The only difference?
More men are willing to admit it.
Which brings us to the comments.
You notice how almost none of the women are acknowledging to have been in this situation? And that they are actually going out of their way to talk about “how difficult it was to get a guy away”?
Yes, believe it or not all of these women — the vast majority of which you know are single, going through guy after guy — have never ever been the vulnerable ones in a relationship. And yet despite their baggage and proven trash track-record they just know a guy would be lucky to have them.
The reason for these absurd responses is plain and simple solipsism. No need to dress it up. The cope is obvious.
But why do these women act this way, compared to the men?
Some of it is actually social programming. I am not so sure in the 1950s (not my fav decade FYI) women would be able to get away with this ego. A lot of “patriarchial” society was indeed based upon stamping out this feral aspect in women.
But suffice to say a lot’s shifted since then. People are encouraged to have no responsibility, and women in particular as “victims” of men can do no wrong.
What you are witnessing here, however, is not “women” but an example of them at their lowest resolution.
I spoke about this last year at the 22 Convention in Orlando. But women who have not embarked on the path of integration are helpless. The feminine in its essence is formless, and struggles to act or build.
A beautiful version of this is a woman who cannot do much for herself, but inspires the man to do it for them. She is gracious and thankful for his action, and like a garden being tended bears fruit.
The ugly version of this femininity, however, is entitlement. This is a woman who can’t or won’t do much for herself — but also doesn’t inspire much for it. She is selfish with energy, and makers herself and the men who get trapped in her web miserable.
Understand: the corollary to a lack of form or ability to act is an inability to take responsibility.
Which is why unless a woman is integrating, she will not resonate with self-improvement. The only thing a feminine woman takes responsibility for is inspiring a man to be responsible for her. Hence any problems are naturally *his* to own. He should fix them, not her.
While there is some truth to this — in the sense that women are mirrors of their men, and can shift very fast when their man does — overall the reason for this delusion is self-protection. Women are afraid of ownership because it takes them away from their modus operandi and forces them to acknowledge their fragility. It is a similar step for men who may at some point realize they must come to terms with their own emotions.
At any rate, I think you get the picture.
These women are telling themselves a story because the real story would paint them in a very painful light.
Anyway, if you want to learn to read through these women and protect yourselves?
I highly recommend you get my masterclass.
Module 2 alone goes into this in detail. And that’s a mere 15% of the course.
Grab it here: https://masterclass.patstedman.com/sales-page